FEATURE: Spotlight: TOKiMONSTA — Music Musings & Such

FEATURE:

Spotlight

TOKiMONSTA

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RATHER than…

quote any reviews, there are a few interviews with TOKiMONSTA that I want to source. Real name Jennifer Lee, she has had a remarkable life and career so far. Her latest album, 2020’s Oasis Nocturno (Instrumentals), is excellent. Although there are quite a few guest voices, I think TOKiMONSTA’s talent shines through. The first interview is from Pitchfork in 2017. TOKiMONSTA (Lee) discussed a potentially fatal brain disease that changed her life:

“For Jennifer Lee, the worst part of recovering from two brain surgeries wasn’t the loss of her ability to comprehend language. It wasn’t even the fact that she had to relearn how to walk, or the extreme anxiety she felt stepping outside after an extended recovery period spent immobile. The worst part was that Lee, who produces kinetic, psychedelic hip-hop beats as TOKiMONSTA, couldn’t make music anymore. She couldn’t even hear it as music. “All music just sounded like noise,” she tells me by phone recently. “I remember being like, ‘Ooh, this is weird! This is metallic, harsh nonsense to me.’”

The Los Angeles-based Lee, who was diagnosed with an extremely rare and potentially fatal brain disease called Moyamoya at the end of 2015, eventually regained her ability to comprehend music. Her forthcoming third album, Lune Rouge, consists entirely of songs she wrote after her recovery. Though its lyrics don’t address the specifics of her ordeal (and often arrive via guests like Joey Purp, MNDR, and Yuna), the music is embedded with Lee’s struggle to overcome the biggest challenge of her life. Lune Rouge tends more melancholy than the West Coast beatwork she’s produced in the past, which has included bold and bright collaborations with the likes of Anderson .Paak and Gavin Turek, but it also carries an undertone of hope, even exuberance. Sharp, clear instrumentals cut through airy vocals across 11 tracks that raise Lee’s music to new emotional heights.

“Moyamoya” is a Japanese word that means “a puff of smoke.” When your main arteries start shrinking, the blood still wants to reach your brain, so it starts taking these smaller, weaker collateral vessels. Usually you wouldn't be able to see those little veins, but because they’re taking more blood to compensate, it looks like a puff of smoke is coming from the base of your brain. If your arteries start to shut down and the blood starts to take these weaker vessels, you’re either going to have a stroke or an aneurysm or thrombosis. It just explodes, basically, because those veins are not meant to take on an artery’s worth of blood.

Without any treatment, most people don’t live past 40. Eventually your arteries shut off. I didn’t know how much time I had, and I was leaving on tour. You know how with medical stuff you have to usually get a referral and insurance and all sorts of crazy shit? It’s a really convoluted process to get treatment. But I was a ticking time bomb. I was really desperate and scared shitless. So I went online and found that the leading institute for this really rare condition was at Stanford, and I found an email address for the head nurse at the neurosurgery department. She replied to me, I sent them my paperwork, and they were like, “OK, come in.”

After the first surgery, I had a couple of childhood friends come visit. I was tired but fine—joking with them, playing dominos. It was looking good. The day after they left, I couldn’t talk or understand speech. I could still think thoughts, but all the words I knew were gone. I even tried texting people and my texts were complete gibberish. It was almost like suddenly I spoke a different language than everyone else. I’m a fairly chatty person, and to take that facility away was just a visceral pain. But the worst part was that I couldn’t understand any kind of music whatsoever. It didn’t sound right.

As time progressed, my language got better and better. On my birthday, January 26th, I had my last scan that said the surgery was successful and I got to go home. My speech was at about 70 percent. I could communicate, but I would have frequent brain farts. Also, because I basically had been sitting in bed 24 hours a day, I lost all the muscle tone in my body, so it was really difficult for me to walk.

The whole month of February [2016], I tried to acclimate myself to my life again. The most difficult thing was trying to work on music. I opened Ableton and I couldn’t understand what I was doing, even though at that point my speech was at 90 percent. I tried to make music and it was just garbage. The part of my brain that knew how to put sounds together was broken. I didn’t understand why it didn’t make sense anymore. When you make music, so much of it is intuitive and natural. I could always put sounds together, play a little ditty on the piano. I never had to think about doing it. And then I’m there in front of my computer going, “I don’t understand if this is a good sound or a bad sound. I don’t know if I’m playing a melody.” I didn’t want to pity myself, but it was a heart-wrenching pain”.

It is amazing looking at all of the E.P.s, singles and albums that TOKiMONSTA has put out since 2008’s E.P., Bedtime Lullabies. It is hard to define TOKiMONSTA’s music. It is Hip-Hop/Rap mixed with Electronic. It is a wonderful blend that any listener can pick up new and appreciate. Although there has been new music from TOKiMONSTA this year, I am not sure whether there are plans for another album or E.P. We shall see what comes next. Last year, DJ Booth chatted with TOKiMONSTA about her classical training and special blend of sounds:

“DJBooth: Growing up, what was your first experience with rap music?

TOKiMONSTA: The very first piece of music I purchased was Coolio’s “Gangsta’s Paradise,” which I bought as a single. I could’ve bought the album, but I guess I didn’t understand how purchasing music worked. I bought it at the same time I bought “Waterfalls” by TLC; those were the first two music purchases I ever made. Just imagine a very small Asian girl walking into Tower Records and buying those [singles]. And for whatever reason, I bought them on cassette. I carried them with me later on in life and remember asking myself why I bought the single version since it only had one song on it. Shortly after that, I started learning how to make mixtapes, so then it was cool. My mom and my sister bought me a boom box with a CD player and space for two cassettes. That’s when I started recording Westside Connection off the radio. But it was all thanks to Coolio; I’ve gotta thank him.

You’re classically trained in piano. How does that training translate to your beat making?

It had a pretty big impact in a unique way, especially considering the beat scene we had in LA during the 2010s era. Most of us, myself included, were making loops, so there were no transitions. The beat would play, and then the drums would come in, and that’s what we would play for each other. Because I had this classical background, I felt I needed to elaborate on it and turn it from just a beat to a song. It was important for me to not only have a beat looping; I wanted to sequence everything and arrange it like it was telling a story. To this day, it’s still an important part of my process. I want these songs to have a beginning, a middle, and an end with something to follow. I don’t want the beginning of the song to sound just like the end of the song.

Your music sits snugly in between the worlds of hip-hop, EDM, and dance music. What inspired you to move toward a more amorphous sound as your career has progressed?

Creative necessity and evolution as an artist. I can’t make the same things I made 10 years ago. Even if I wanted to make Midnight Menu again, I’m not in the same headspace. I’ll listen to that album and be impressed with certain things I did because I don’t think in those ways anymore. I appreciate that era of myself when I wasn’t equipped with the knowledge I have today, but it made me creative in a super-specific way. Now, I have so much knowledge, and I’m a much better engineer and songwriter. Not to say I wasn’t good at things then, but I didn’t know how to work with vocalists at the time. If I make music to satiate the needs of someone who liked my music from a certain era, then I’d be doing myself a disservice. Fortunately, I feel like my evolution has been natural. Every album is a little further down the road from the last one.

It’s been almost five years since your moyamoya diagnosis and subsequent surgeries. How have you been holding up since then? What about your life as a producer has changed post-moyamoya?

It almost goes back to what I was saying before. If tomorrow didn’t exist, would I be happy with my output? I almost died, and it was not chill. I had to write a will; I had to decide where all my stuff goes. No one’s living today and thinking about the possibility that they might die soon. Sometimes we do see it coming, and when you think about everything you’ve done in your life, the regrets start to settle in. I made it through, and after recovering, I thought about what tomorrow brings. You can’t predict what comes next. Make every day count”.

I am finishing off with this interview. One of the most interesting questions raised regards TOKiMONSTA being a trailblazing Asian-American artist. It is clear that she is a hugely inspiring and important artist:

“In the early MySpace days, TOKiMONSTA recalls hiding her gender, fearful that if someone thought they were listening to production by a young woman, they would hold preconceived notions about her talent. “I was very mysterious back then, I had no photos up,” she laughs. At the time, there were a few women who she could look up to – her personal favorites were Bjork and Missy Elliott – but no one she felt was exactly like her. Eventually, as her career grew, she came to understand the magnitude of her success and the impact it could have on others. “I know that just by existing and accomplishing things, it feeds fuel to the younger generation,” she says.

Since then, she has survived a devastating health crisis, become the first woman and Asian American to be nominated for a Grammy in electronic music, started her own label, and most recently curated the Twitch event Every Woman, sponsored by Native Instruments among others, to provide more visibility for women in different music industry roles. In the two-day event, TOKiMONSTA provided a spotlight for a diverse group of women, from all areas of the music business, to share their advice, discuss pertinent issues, and give live-streamed performances like the one above. Through Every Woman, TOKiMONSTA has created her own open community of women, sharing in the highs and lows of working in music and helping each other succeed. “I learned so much from this event,” she says.

You’ve often been seen as a trailblazer. For example, you were the first woman and first Asian American to be nominated for a Grammy in electronic music. Do you feel a lot of pressure to act as a role model?

It is and it isn’t. I think in the earlier days, it was a lot more pressure because I had to constantly prove myself. Everyone else making beats was a dude. I worried they wouldn’t believe me, or even if my music was good, I would be judged more harshly because of who I was. But by the time I had got the Grammy nomination, I was very much tenured. I knew I had been doing this long enough. I had staying ability, and I didn’t come out of nowhere as a gimmick. You can strip me of my identity, and I still make really good music, you know? And that’s what’s important for me. Being this trailblazer is not something I intended to do, I just wanted to be a really dope musician. And in the process of that, my identity ties back into everything. The early days, I actually didn’t even want to say I was a girl, because I didn’t want people to judge or to have these preconceived notions about me, but as the person I am now, I realized that representation is so important. And even though I never set out to be a trailblazer, I take the responsibility of being that person. I didn’t have anyone like me when I was growing up. I know that by existing and accomplishing things, it only feeds fuel to the younger generation.

You’ve built such a sustainable career over the course of about 10 years in an industry known for burn out and high turnover. Do you have any advice for other young women hoping to have a career like yours?

The music industry is so fickle, but for me, the main thing is and always will be the fact that I love making music. I don’t care about fame, and I don’t care about anything else. I only care about the career because I need to make sure that I can survive off this and can continue to make the music. For a lot of people that are trying to get into the music industry, I think you have to really know why you want to do it. For a lot of the musicians I know that are really successful, a lot of them (even if they’re making a ton of money) don’t care about the money. They couldn’t care less, they just want to be able to make music and share it with the most amount of people possible. If you can stay true to your vision and not get caught up in a lot of the ancillary things, it’s possible to find success. It also takes a lot of self confidence to make it in music because you need to believe in your vision. I find it helps to have other friends that you make music with. I think, for me, a lot of my success comes from where I started, in my LA community of musicians.

You are involved in so many aspects of the music business. Beyond your work as a producer, you also have your own label and host your channel on Twitch. Why is it important to you to work in various aspects of the music industry?

I think it’s just the kind of person I am. I have so many interests. And the reason why I make music is because I love music. I love listening to music. There’s the music making side of me, and the music loving side of me. Through the label, I’m able to express my tastemaker side, and I get to pick these amazing artists and help them shine and share their music. I was always the kind of friend who would burn people CDs back in the day or send people random Spotify links to new music so that’s kind of my more professional way of doing the same thing. With the Every Woman event, I was thinking beyond myself, wondering what needs to happen right now. I knew I would really love to see something like this. I decided, if no one’s gonna do it, then I’m gonna do it. I’ve survived this long by being a go-getter. If I want to do something, I do it”.

Whilst TOKiMONSTA is not new and she has been around a while, her music has not been heard by everyone. With every release, we get new layers and elements. I love TOKiMONSTA’s music and think that everyone should hear it. Go and follow her on social media and experience one of the finest composers, artists and producers in the world. I will wrap up here. Go and investigate a wonderful talent who has many more…